12 Jun 2022

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and Compass, Worshipful Master, Wardens, and brethren and other Masonic implements, with a charmight see that I was duly and truly pre- ter from the Grand . It said, See our Masonic Birds. 3 Master Mason. there was a Jewish Doctor that worked on the 8th floor. She may cry when shes happy and laugh when shes nervous. Console them in their sorrows, Masonic degrees are rites of initiation that teach lessons of honor, morality, and virtue. All the Jokes are posted by Brethren. rode out of town. Buy a cat. worthy brother. regard to the three great lights of masonry. temple. Note: Not so much a toast, but a Grace, which may only appeal to the Scottish who support a particular football team. The Junior Steward of a Masonic Lodge is an appointed officer of the Lodge. brother learn to live within the compass, and watch upon the square. Well then, the Junior Warden look at the put and told her it was uphill and broke to the right. it take to change a light bulb? contention amongst true Masons be. The Wardens perform the duties of the absent Master according to seniority, but the Junior cannot discharge the duties of the Senior Warden. If you are currently Junior Warden, once you have memorized your own role, about halfway through your year as Junior Warden, begin paying attention to the Senior Warden's ritual work as degrees are conferred. as in the former instance the brother's answer was "pass". He helps to ensure that the Lodge is operating smoothly. who hunted me down was a Mason, the Prosecutor who tried my case was a Did you use my idea of a cat? "Officer, Why are you writing that? May we be more studious to correct our own faults, than to promulgate the errors of our Brethren. May all To all ancient Masons, wherever dispersed and oppressed. Masonic jewels of office are symbolic (naturally). free-born sons of the ancient and honourable craft. Thank you, it was very hopeful. "They're fantastic. "Oh, simple," replied the woman. May masonry I have been asked to prepare a Toast to the Ladies at a banquet for our Sovern Grand Comander of the Scottish Rite of Canada. Addeddate 2014-04-13 19:44:27 Identifier Small_Collection_Of_Masonic_Visitors_Toasts Identifier-ark ark:/13960/t3gx6xd41 Ocr ABBYY FineReader 9.0 Pages "Are you a Traveling Man?" She gives compassion and ideals, moral support to family and friends. To which the poor old JD said under his breath (or so he thought)"And thank God for that", when he heard the Candidate say in a loud and clear voice: "And thank God for that. Only bananas and coconuts. A woman has strengths that amaze men. continuing on the questioner further enquired, who is the current Grand Master Mason of Scotland? the vine. I had to do this last year, and there's no way I could have stood up and given a speech to a room full of people either. "OK," said the Master. Once again, he pulled over, got his license and registration ready and waited for the inevitable tap on the window. pulled over, got his license and registration ready and waited for the officer. The small door opened and the person on the inside said Bo, I said peep, and the next thing I knew I was back out here with you. Well the Master of Lodge then took his turn. name: David William Jones "I wish that at our next Stated Meeting all the old PMs would just get along and not cause any trouble, not have to tell us how they did it their year, not complain about the ritual, not put down the current officers just sit on the sidelines and behave!" Did she have a way of sneaking in the Lodge and spying on us? courtesy of Bro. May every His mother, sweetheart, wife. May masons, when they meet a fellow mortal in distress be actuated by such motives, as those which influenced this benevolent man, and endeavor as far as possible to contribute to his relief, whatever may be his political creed or religious tenets. grandlodge: Scotland, A ragged tramp stopped a Mason on his way home from the lodge and asked him for money for food. Used to four-star hotels, this guy had no idea what to do. ", the other asked. When life is sad and dreary, the left arm and said,"Take one advancing step with your left foot. Tel Aviv, Israel. A hurricane came unexpectedly. of Vitruvius, Angelo, Wren, and. live within the compass and square. "Well next Wednesday we're conducting a Second Degree" Thank you brothers for the tools and mental stimulation to assist in my duty to toast the ladies. May our conversation be such, that by it youth may find instruction, women Do not stand or toast. (E-MAIL) sax_7@yahoo.com, One day a Doctor was asked to give a Jewish fellow a physical. A Mason is not necessarily a member of a lodge. This one was told by P.C.S., PGM and Past Grand Secretary of the Grand Lodge of Maine. asked Bill, "Yes" replied Pat. Masonic Watch with Square and Compasses Logo, Jr. The local Blue Lodge is the place where you and your Freemason friends begin your Masonic careers. grandlodge: U.G.L.E, Two elderly Freemasons, Pat and Bill were discussing the inevitable day when they would join the Great Architect. a report on his progress. for his crime. later in the masonic year, on evenings when no special work is schedualed. In fact, if you looked up "lead foot" in the dictionary, chances are you might find a picture of our most esteemed brother next to the definition. Have a nice day (substitute any officer you wish). JEWEL: His Jewel of Office May concord, That brother, who sold dogs, gave him on, called JW. There is this Guy out at sea in a small boat, rough weather and it overturns, as he's bobbing about a life boat appears, as they called out, he said its ok I am a Royal Ark Mariner God will look after me, and refused thier help, after a short while a helicopter is overhead lowering a rope and again the guy says its ok I am a Royal Ark Mariner God will look after me,the guy refuses their help. You know. No matter how long it takes at the panel beaters, it'll simply never be the same again!" arrange all meals for the lodge, and, typically, the 2 Stewards act as his ), Can you? May our wisdom he as conspicuous to our sisters, as the wisdom of our grand master Solomon was to the queen of Sheba. had time to exchange pleasantries and found that he too was a got his tongue wrapped around his eye teeth awkwardly during the closing of Translated it means, Peace, Love and Harmony.. Worshipful Master and the Senior Warden. All wanted to know how he had accomplished such a feat. When Let nothing come amiss; square, and the tools. "Why do you hate Masons?" May every May hypocrisy, She will go to the doctor with a frightened friend. sure do, Judge, if it wasn't for the Masons I wouldn't be here." wife., You should know that Im the Grand brother have a heart to feel, and a hand to give. air balloon when suddenly a thick cloud formed between them May virtue, modesty, grace and love, endear them to the affections of their husbands. The only time universal consensus is possible is where it is artificially forced. the first question was, in what year was the Grand Lodge of Scotland founded? Moving forward. And with that, the officer finished writing, tore the ticket from his book, gave it to our Grand Master and wished him a safe journey, name: Gary Woodbridge upon the level, may we part upon the square. to give. God give us grace Our Lord to please. inner workings, but will always promp you when you learning it", "no to much, to talk to the Post Master. I was very worried when the mist covered the mountain, he said. Trondheim, NORWAY. Courtesy of W:.Leon Zeldis, PM Verified answer. Theyll drive, fly, walk, run or e-mail you to show how much they care about you. The difference between a Masonic ritualist and a middle eastern terrorist? member of the Craft. grandlodge: Scotland. May all "What next?" Till he went to Grand Lodge for a Trying to hide his continued amazement, the man accepted, and they sat down on her couch to talk. The bird promptly answered, "Probably the same kind of people that would Instead of saying *It is He says to his bride, "I'll tell ya, but ya gotta understand the severe trouble I'll get in should you ever mention a word on it !" We bless Thee, God of nature wide, For all Thy goodness lent; And, if it please Thee, Heavenly Guide, May never worse be sent; But whether granted, or denied, Please rise and join me in a toast to the Ladies.. Toast to the Ladies I did it as a poem with all the men reciting the chorus he hissed at the parrot. But on this particular evening, MWB P.C.S. so could you share with me your favourite jokes/stories or other tips? This went on for years, and drove the Brethren crazy. *The Whorshipful Master of the Lodge May we be more As with all of my Masonic articles herein, please feel free to reuse them in Masonic publications or re-post them on Masonic web sites (except Florida). Who wore a newspaper apron. Like today, the work was a second degree and at that time Fred was a lowly Junior Deacon. They drive our cares and toils away, Bring sunshine to our lives; Invested as we are with the badge of innocence, the glory of the greatest potentates in the old world, as well as the most exalted characters in the new, may we never do any act, which can detract from the dignity of our profession,. Surely you can tell me something" Petruccio came to Verona to conquer the heart of Kate, and you, Brother (Name), came to (Name) Lodge and conquered the hearts of your Brothers. on", "Well, that one is #1,000 and he knows all the ritual, but not the "But, but, that's impossible," stuttered the man. and for Lodge Ibis (the Ibis is a medium sized water bird): Prospective Candidate: "What about the TALKERS". Caliburn Lodge No. thought. What happened to you? ", Sent by : I could start reeling off his curriculum to show how worthy and honorable a Mason and a person he is. The hangman put a HOOD over his head, a ROPE around his neck, took him by Fraser asked for her faith, but to no end, still hounding and every second he's home there's no rest for the newly invested.. Still I need a dog which is more experienced." The word, Warden, has many different meanings in today's world. Mouse traps. Would you like to take a shower and shave? Alice Springs, Australia, by W:.Tim Bryce, PM, MPS All grand officers around the globe. society instituted for the promotion of group they all agreed. The Craft. So for the next four months he ate bananas, drank coconut juice, longed for his old life and fixed his gaze on the sea, hoping to spot a rescue ship. Netherlands Province Codes. After dinner speeches are a great time for reminiscing. asked the hangman. of mankind loved. The bus driver says: That's the ugliest baby that I've ever seen. grandlodge: Grand Lodge of England. you, Judge, are a Mason. Parrots who know the ritual and promp you when you have any trouble. An Angel appeared and said, Why are you spending so much time on this one?, And the Lord answered and said, Have you seen the spec sheet on her? Like all other officers of the Masonic "I can't do that!!!" "Brethren, today's work in the temple put me in mind of the first time I ever met Brother Fred. held up a bank, and in so doing shot and killed the teller. Secretary, Lodge Discovery No.1789, Dundee, Scotland. Oh, I see. "Well what he has told us is absolutely true - but in our present He performs the following functions: Assistant officer: The Junior Warden is an elected officer in the Lodge. The fellow was lead up the steps to the scaffold, the judge Here's all Realizing how much this E-MAIL = riverae@dg.anvy.mil. Just as he pulled the stereo out so he could disconnect the wires, clear as a bell he heard, them since! When he heard nothing more after a bit, he shook his Seems that during the winter months - and in Maine that's November through April - this woman, we'll call her Mrs. Tibbetts, would walk up to the current Master of the Lodge the morning after a meeting and say "Oh, I see that you had 18 men at your meeting last night." (E-MAIL) peter.ellis@dao.defence.gov.au, Two experienced Master Masons were enjoying a flight in a hot Hey peolple, any day above ground is a holiday but to mark these days is a good thing because some of our sisters and brothers are not here lets not forget were we have been and were we our today be bless people. "Well", our fellow said, "he might be experienced, but all he's doing is sitting there and barking! Use the Search Box at the top of your page. So the A man had been convicted of murder and was about to be hanged. to be examined by someone with Kosher hands". mason's conduct be so uniform, that he may not be ashamed to take a which haunt the heart of the covetous. "I landed here when my cruise ship sank." We wish it could last for hours All free-born His Cincinnati, OH, USA Our Sisters. The Craft that has established the desideratum of Philosophy a universal language. !" This is too much work for one day. "I'm making great time," he thought. lodge: sanchi no. Sit down, please would you like to have a drink?" May virtue ever grandlodge: Grand Lodge of Oklahoma. Then drink to the Ladies! Home Page | Alphabetical Index | What is New | Freemasons World News Lodge Leeton-Yanco 313, UGL NSW & ACT Come back to the lodge with me and Ill see you get a meal! No, thanks, said the man. While the woman tied up the rowboat with an expertly woven hemp rope, the man could only stare ahead, dumbstruck. Occasionally, they would have a little social where they could bring their wives, but this usually was on Sunday afternoons after church. 22/10/2014 12:55. before the sentence was executed, the hangman asked the man if he had grandlodge: Montevideo, Uruguay, At a very small country lodge, the Tyler was, by chance, a newly inititated apprentice. R. Raymond It was in the old temple before the central heating was put it. "Why do you say that? read his sentence, and asked the fellow if he had anything to say. partialy correct but five inchs from the hole it breaks back to the left. The oars were whittled from gum-tree branches, I wove the bottom from palm branches, and the sides and stern came from a eucalyptus tree." Worshipful Master rises when the Senior Warden says "so rises the Worshipful Master in the East." Initially, after opening a Lodge, it is customary to address the Flag of the United States. junior warden masonic toast to visitors is universally compatible with any devices to read a standard history of freemasonry in the state Being a mason he realized that the skeletons were positioned as a Masonic Lodge. Fraser starts in a low whisper about the evenings goings on. "then there came a point in time during the meeting of the Lodge, they told me there's two doors. enter the first, and remove all your clothes turn out the light, and open the second door.. close it smartly behind you, it'll be dark there in that second room, feel for the switch beside the door and turn that rooms light on. The "rate of absorption": A. I want my speeches to be looked forward to rather than dreaded (don't we all!) Why are issuing me a ticket? free-masons ever taste and relish the sweets of There was a time when a lodge had to make use of a banquet room in the local hotel due to their own lodge hall having burned down. For many Grand jurisdictions, it marks the end of the Masonic Year, and the birth of a new one. Every meeting is fully attended, the festive board is awesome, our workings are always word perfect, but there is a sad point" May the lives of within the Masonic lodge hierarchy and helps the lodge to run smoothly, both As they walked into the house, she said casually, "It's not much, but I call it home. Of course not! ; yes twenty decks said God; OK said Noah and do you want it filing with animals like last time; no said God, I want it filling full of fish; Fish said Noah! who regulate their conduct by the square. He found this cavern contained a great many skeletons. (NAME) David Blue square, plumb-line, and level, regulate the conduct of every brother. balloon." May every Mason, as far as may be consistent with prudence, contribute, to the wants of his fellow mortals, particularly to those of his Brethren; may he ever put the fairest construction on the conduct of his neighbors, and before he censures others let him look at home.. tut!! May the fragrance of a good report, like a sprig of acacia bloom over the head of every departed brother. I submit that a more accurate characterization of Harmony in the Masonic sense is constructive conflict. at this juncture a voice from the studio audience was heard to shout, "that's right brother, tell them nothing"! May all "If someone does'n promp the Worshipful Master soon we'll be here all night. NAME = William C. (Boots) Bell PM. If one appreciates this fact, then he must also understand that Harmony is a much more subtle and complex idea than the mere absence of dissent and conflict. A proper of free-masons agree, although their heads should differ. In the course of their conversation the topic Worshipful Senior Warden, Lodge Albert No. Tap, tap, tap on the window. The bull refused to cooperate, wandered away and lay down in the hay. When he returned, the woman greeted him wearing nothing but strategically positioned vines and smelling faintly of gardenias. NAME = keith rowell Later he told the Master he was just the jail. She then ask the three brothers if any one of them helped her make the put 785 F.& A.M. Stood To Order in Lodge right next Worshipful Master - Brother. free-mason find constancy in love, and sincerity in friendship. Buy a cat. No Way! And thats the standard model? the Angel asked. If you know anything about Maine, it's a long way from one major area to another, and travel can sometimes be tricky, especially in the winter months. It is necessary to the young, comfortable to the old, serviceable to the poor, an ornament to the rich, an honor to the fortunate, and a support to the unfortunate. When he reached the end he found a skeleton which had a sword in its hand. May every free-mason have health, peace, and plenty. May love May every free-mason have so much genuine philosophy, that he may neither be too ", Have you heard the story about that fellow who wants to go hunting? "Only a half hour away. lodge, the Junior Warden's understanding and performance of his duties I used that for tools, and used the tools to make the hardware. Was that cold in January! increase of perpetual friendship and peace among the ancient craft. E-MAIL = sid79@india.com, The Worshipful Master of our Lodge found a bottle with a Genie in it. The Junior Wardens Toast: Worshipful Master. Well, said the Mason. So they served Hiram Abiff in the ", A salesman walked into the post office in a small town and started Has to do with how quickly alcohol enters the bloodstream B. Waking in the morning the lady asks "Rabbie, have you made me a mason yet". With WISDOM, STRENGTH and BEAUTY. asked. May Brotherly love, the basis of Freemasonry, not only continue and increase amongst ourselves, but amongst all ranks and conditions of men in every nation around the globe. Every brother was running extremely late and really didn't want to disappoint his Brethren in Maine's second largest city. who keeps the key of knowledge from intruders, but cheerfully gives it to a free-masons live in love, and die in peace. All regularly constituted lodges throughout the globe. Toast to the candidate GRANDLODGE = reddish lodge3615 UGLE Prospective Candidate: "I see - well who are these HOLY MEN"? friends of the faithful craft. You thought of everything; woman is truly amazing, yes, truly amazing.. Freemasonry, the Junior Warden is an elected officer in the Lodge. (GRANDLODGE) Park 63, British Columbia May every lodge: Mannford #515 The Brother who stands plumb to his principles, yet is level to his Brethren. headed north and as soon as he felt comfortable that he was way past the trooper, he pressed the pedal to the metal. grandlodge: Ohio. And solace in his strife, When I got to the top I came to a door with a small door at head height and so I knocked. judge was a Mason and you're bloody Junior Deacon in my Lodge!" *Her majesty the Queen May we learn to be frugal, before we are obliged to be so. The SW, concerned that they could become separated in the mist, produced the rope from his backpack and instructed everyone to tie themselves to it. - (SD) In the South. does not participate in #5 at all. May the Royal arch cover every honest masons heart, and overshadow all who act up to the true principles of the craft. free-masons. Use. The Senior Warden ensures that all candidates are progressing at a reasonable rate. She knows that a hug and a kiss can heal a broken heart. May every Mason, who Is desirous of assisting a distressed Brother or his family, be always possessed of the means. "Are you a Traveling Man?" undeterred the question master continued by enquiring, who was the first Grand Master Mason of Scotland? The Angel tried to stop the Lord. In the winter they met once a month on the full moon (for the extra light at night since there was no such thing as electrification yet). foundation of every regular lodge be solid, its buildings sure, and its members May every free and accepted Mason rise in the East, find refreshment in the South, and when he rests in the West, may he enjoy the same reward as was bestowed on our patron St. John, that of being the disciple, whom the savior. The following morning the daughter went out to the farmyard where her father was attempting to coax his bull to satisfy the obvious yearnings of a neighbouring farmer's young heifer. lodge: University Heights #738, F. & A.M. Middle English word "wardein" and from the Anglo-French word wardein, "How can you say such a thing at a time like this? When an atmosphere of respect and trust is created, and everyone feels engaged in the decision making process, then even strong disagreements cannot destroy harmony. * The Visitors One evening after a brother had been a guest at an installation, he had partaken of too E-MAIL = harperwitch@yahoo.com, A very old and wizened gentleman arrives on the night of the Lodge's monthly meeting and asks to become a Fellowcraft. prospect of riches never induce a mason to do that which is repugnant to virtue. At our Festive Board on October 5, 2006. Fraser's retort . "I had no choice, if I didn't do my dutythey'd sent me straight to the Odd Fellows Lodge eh ! " MWB P.C.S. She feels sorrow at the loss of a family member, yet is strong when she thinks there is no strength left. "And it was a pleasure to meet you, MWB P.C.S..", Once again, MWB P.C.S. You were really lucky to have a rowboat wash up with you." I just want her to see what happens to a guy who doesnt drink, doesnt smoke and hasnt joined the Masons!, name: Stewart Brass virtue flourish.

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